Thanks Dad

Tomorrow is Father's Day and I've had my dad on my mind a lot today. I miss Dad and Mom a lot. My two sisters and I have been truly blessed with loving, Christian parents. Dad has always possessed a quiet strength and has always demonstrated his love through the sacrifices he has made to ensure that his children experience the best in life. He worked the majority of his life deep within the mountains of southern West Virginia as a coal miner. I'm proud of him and the heritage that has established and the legacy that he is passing on through us. I've never been ashamed of my Dad and he has been and will continue to be my hero.

He has always provided for us. I have memories of how stressful "contract" time was. Sometimes, miners would go on strike for weeks at a time as their unions fought for safer working conditions, better health benefits and fairer wages. And in typical Dad fashion, he would make a few calls and off he would go to work at gas drilling rigs so our family wouldn't have to go without. The recent BP disaster in the Gulf reminded me of the time that Dad had a near miss when the rig he was working on had an explosion. He has had several of those near misses in his occupation.

Dad never complained much about work and always had time to attend the activities my sisters were involved in as well as participate with me in sports and attend A LOT of games. We've also enjoyed many hunting trips and still laugh about the time I was chased through the mountains by a wild boar. We have sat on the banks of streams and lakes for hours on end fishing and have great stories from those times. Like the time when we were using Velveeta cheese as bait (trout love it) and Mom took a bite of the cheese. I yelled to Dad and many people around the bank heard me say, "Dad, Mom's eating all our bait." Of course they thought Mom was eating worms.

Dad and Mom made many trips to watch me play college football and during a conference championship game in Salem, the rain was horrific. Most fans either listened on the radio or stayed in their cars, but not Dad. There he stood behind the bench cheering me on and reminding me not to fumble the exchange with the quarterback. Dad got soaked to the bone as he watched us win our conference championship.

We've had memorable trips as a family to Myrtle Beach, Gatlinburg, Charleston, and Pulaski. We've laughed at how easy it is to scare Dad we giggle as he draws back his fist like he's going to whack you. We've listened to his crow calls, his "hooty-who," and the infamous "berrherrr." We enjoy his "two-two bats in the belphry ah ah.' We've joined him in his singing of the morning, like "We three kings of orient are," and "I've got friends in low places." We've blessed him as he sneezes (a minimum of 10 or so sneezes each time). We've cracked up at his sayings …like one my sister shared today. Apparently, Mom fixed a lot for lunch and Dad ate too much so he said, "Barb, I need some baking soda." "Baking soda? What in the world do you need that for Horace?" "So, I can rise up from this table." And just so you know "that's absolutely imperigoric." Oh yea and his proverbs and words of wisdom… like "Don't believe any of what you hear and only half of what you see," and "you can't hurt a man of steel, but you can pee on him and make him rust."

I could go on and on, but there's something for which I can never thank Dad enough and that is his spiritual leadership and guidance in our lives. We were raised to understand that Jesus loved us but it was simply not something shared verbally. Dad demonstrated the love of Christ through his own actions. Of course, Dad's not perfect…only one man has been…but he's pretty close in my book. I was taught a long time ago that "there is no success without sacrifice. And any time you see a successful person it's because someone sacrificed." I recognize that any little bit of success I've experienced in life, I owe to Mom and Dad and their sacrifice for me.

So, on this Father's Day weekend, I just want to say "Thanks Dad." You'll never understand how blessed Debby, Brenda and I are because of your guidance and influence in our lives. You area awesome and make life rich, meaningful and just plain fun. "Now study on that!" I love you! ~Your favorite son~

Soaring

I have goals for just about everything, even when I go on vacation. Charity always laughs at me and thinks I'm a little goofy…well, she is right about the goofy part. For example, I will have goals for how many books I want to read, how many days I will exercise, things I want to experience, etc. One of my goals on this vacation was to record as many things in words and pictures as possible. I also wanted to see God's message in the experiences that we had each day. That's one of the reasons why I'm posting thoughts about our Aruba vacation on my blog.

We had been saving for this trip for two years and one of my goals was to go parasailing. Doesn't sound like a lofty goal, however, I share Ally's same fear of heights. This fear was reaffirmed after we arrived and I watched how high those parachutes actually rise. I didn't say much about fulfilling my goal of parasailing, in fact I tried to deflect as many questions from my bride as possible. But, Charity kept prodding me and I kept making excuses and then leave it to Abby. She started begging for me to take her. "Come on Dad, pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaassssssssse. You're not afraid are you?" "Uh hum…of course not, I would say." Wink, wink, to myself. "And besides, I'll bet you are not old enough, Abby, and after thinking about it...well it is awefully selfish of me to go all alone. So we'll just wait until more than one of us can go. And maybe we can all just go on a bananna boat ride." Wink, wink to myself again. "Over there's the man who schedules the trips, Tim. Go ask him if Abby's old enough and you two can go." "Gee thanks, Hon! Good thing I have a lot of life insurance." I thought to myself.

So over to the Bobby McFerrin looking dude I go. "Oh, no problem mon, we take you and the little lady. Don't worry...be happy!" He actually didn't say the last part. So, we got on board a speed boat with three guys from the Bronx, and on the way out to the speed boat, I kept coaching...I mean asking Abby…"Are you sure you want to do this?" "I'm a little nervous, but it'll be fun Dad." Of course, I was a gentleman about the whole situation and allowed Abby to go first. She loved it. "That was awesome, Dad," she said as she was reeled back in to the boat.

With a hug and a kiss and a "you can do it, Dad," I was released into the horizon with a big gust of wind and all I can say is the time 'sailed' by... too quickly. After making a perfect two point landing on the back of the boat, I received high fives, hugs, and big smiles...and that was just from the brawny New Yorkers who were just as scared and me and thankful that I survived. LOL...Abby gave me the knuckles and put her head on my shoulder and said, "I knew you could do it. Can we do it again?" What had just happened? Parasailing...yes, but more importantly a memory with my baby girl to last a lifetime.

As I snapped a picture of my tweenager on the ride back to the shore, a thought came to mind. "I probably would have passed on this goal of mine to parasail had it not been for the encouragement of this little girl young lady. She spurred me on to do something and after the experience, I'm so glad she did. Ephesians 4:29 reminds us; "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." Abby's words encouraged me to do something I'd wanted to do for a long time but I was afraid to do. I wonder how many people in our lives would achieve a goal if you and I would be encouragers?

Stubborn Tenacity

On our recent vacation to Aruba we took an ATV excursion to a remote location on the island. The terrain was rough and rugged and we all enjoyed the challenge of maneuvering the four wheelers across rocks, up inclines, and down to a breathtaking view of the uninhabited side of the island. Allison said our journey there reminded her of the Indiana Jones ride at Disneyland, so she and I found much pleasure in humming the theme song to Indiana Jones as we bounced along the trail.

One of our stops was the "Natural Pool." This pool of water is protected by beautiful rock formations and is a great place to jump in, cool off, and swim with some beautiful fish. However, in order to enjoy the pool, you have to descend 85 steps to the ocean. That doesn't seem like too many steps, but they are "deep" steps and cut out of the rock, so it can be tricky…especially for a 7 year old who is afraid of heights, but Ally insisted on giving it a try. Even though most were enjoying the water while she was merely half-way down the steps, she didn't lose heart, and eventually made it! We enjoyed a brief swim and then had the daunting task of climbing back up the steps, and once again, Ally's stubborn tenacity paid off. She made it back up the steps…tired, but with a huge smile on her face as the others in our group cheered her on for her accomplishment.

I watched her beautiful blue eyes sparkle as she realized what she had just pulled off. Even our tour guide said to me, "Many folks stop here for the view but are too lazy to make the effort to really experience the pool. You should be very proud of yourself little gal."

I wonder how often we miss out on great experiences in life simply because we are not willing to make the effort to do something that is difficult for us? I wonder how often we stop short of living up to our full potential because we want things to come easily? That day at the Natural Pool in Aruba, I was reminded of this poem:

"THE MAN WHO THINKS HE CAN"

If you think you are beaten, you are;
If you think you dare not, you don't.
If you'd like to win, but think you can't
It's almost a cinch you won't.
If you think you'll lose, you've lost,
For out in the world we find
Success beings with a fellow's will;
It's all in the state of mind.

If you think you're outclassed, you are:
You've got to think high to rise.
You've got to be sure of yourself before
You can ever win a prize.
Life's battles don't always go
To the stronger or faster man,
But soon or late the man who wins
Is the man who thinks he can.

Overflow

Proverbs 16:23 "A wise man's heart guides his mouth and his lips promote instruction."

I've heard many of my "older" friends talk about how their parents would wash their mouths out with soap if they used profanity or said harsh words to or about another. But I wonder if a mouth washing is what's really needed when we struggle with harsh, belittling, inappropriate words or profanity. Jesus said that the words we speak are simply an OVERFLOW of what's in our hearts (Matt. 12:34). So, it's really a cleansing of my heart that I need when I say the wrong things. If I'm having trouble with what I say it's symptomatic of a heart problem; therefore, I need to be very aware of WHAT and WHO I'm allowing to influence my heart. Since what I say is an overflow of my heart, I need to ensure that I'm putting the right things into my heart. And, if I really want to know the true condition of my heart, I just need to listen to the words coming out of my mouth.

Washing Away Sins

Vacation is a special time for our family, especially when a beach is involved. I'm a morning person and get very excited to get up early for some "God and me" time on the beach. This year's vacation was no different and the breathtaking beauty of the beaches of Aruba makes for memorable mornings for me.

One of my annual practices at a beach is to stand on the surf's edge and scribble some things in the sand that I think are holding me back in my relationship with Christ. This is a practice that I began in 1988 with a group of youth I took on a spiritual retreat to Myrtle Beach, SC. These writings in the sand may be areas that need to be surrendered but more often involve confession of sins and shortcomings for which I long for the cleansing of Christ. The idea was to confess things to Christ and then step back and watch as the waves washed them away, symbolizing of course, the fresh start that confession and repentance offer.

This year as I made my list in the sand an interesting thing happened. I could hardly get anything written before the gently rolling waves washed them away. I actually found myself getting a little frustrated because I couldn't seem to move far enough away from the water's edge to write in the sand. It was then that I believe the Holy Spirit spoke to me. "Tim, when you are living close enough to the flow of the Spirit, forgiveness and restoration happen very quickly."

I stood in awe and wonder for a moment as I thought about how many times I have not experienced the cleansing power of Christ simply because I refuse to recognize the flow of the Holy Spirit all around me. 1 John 1:9 promises me that if I simply confess, HE is the one who does the washing away. Too often, I think that I have to DO a certain number of things before he will genuinely forgive me.